MARCH 16: MIDDLE SCHOOL PARENT COFFEE HIGHLIGHTS
Didi Hari Krishnan

Middle school admin
Principal: Lauren Mehrbach
Deputy Principal: Chris Beingessner
Deputy Principal: Chris Raymaakers
Dean of Students: Ryan Bruce

Middle school counseling team
Dean of Student Life: Ryan Bruce
Grade 6 Counselor: Mark Swarstad
Grade 7 Counselor: Christa Haycock
Grade 8 Counselor: Ben Robertaccio
Psychologist: Cindy Gilbert

Well-being Check-in Data
We found some overall trends that are significant:
- the average amount of sleep is 7.94 hours (actual hours should be 9 to 11 hours)
- overall 34.6 percent of our students spend one to two hours on their screen
- more time spent on screen makes social life the source of stress
One way to approach this problem is to use sleep as a non-negotiable and take a backward design approach. In other words, structure the day to get close to the recommended sleep hours and let go of other less important things. 

The graph above shows the paradoxical relationship between screen time and social relationships. It seemed that the time participants spent engaging with other children and adults face-to-face made an important difference. The children’s in-person interaction improved significantly in terms of reading facial emotions, while the control group’s skills remained the same. The results suggest that digital screen time, even when used for social interaction, can reduce the time spent developing skills to read non-verbal cues of human emotion (Uhls et al., 2014). Confirms what the counselors have theorized prior to studies conducted. 

What drives more tech use among adolescents?

  • Lack of inhibition regulation
  • Powerful limbic system (emotional drive center)
  • Dopamine sensitivity
  • Development of the “I”
  • Poor risk assessment
  • Social Drive

Popular social media platforms currently trending among teens:

    •    Instagram

    •    Whatsapp

    •    YouTube

    •    TikTok
 (one of the most dangerous apps for teens because of the messages they may get)
    •    Minecraft
    •    Reddit
    •    Houseparty

Advisory:
- helps students know the legal risks and examine the social and emotional risks
- examples of topics covered recently for eighth grade students: new Singapore advisory on sharing of intimate images, sexting, and relationships
*Please note: there have been recent changes to Singapore law that make sharing intimate images a crime. Violations of this law are subject to Singapore’s mandatory reporting law in which all persons, including SAS staff and faculty, are required to follow the law on reporting the crime to the authorities.

 

*Common Sense Media is a good source to visit for technology recommendations.

Key takeaways:
- Pressure-often not singular
- Over trusting
- Present minded—they're not thinking about the future
- Not a big deal for some
- Think they can get away with it
- Perception consequences only happen when leaked
- Consequences that matter are loss of social power 
- Gender differences
- It’s like currency for boys and statement of trust for girls
- Snapchat can be dangerous because some kids can still save it in the "my eyes only" section

What should parents do?
- Be calm and supportive
- Avoid shaming
- Save consequences/punishment until after resolved
- Help identify how to give control back
- Empower child
- Might need to contact school and/or authorities
- Have child delete photos everywhere (Including “my eyes only” section)
- Minimize future risk by building refusal skills
- Form a support team with other involved parents when possible

There is a correlation between time spent on the screen and the effect it has on relationships. Is tech impacting our social skills?
- Decreased attention span
- Immediate gratification & FOMO
- Conversations (quality and connection)
- Conflict Resolution
- Communications Etiquette
- Lack of Empathy
- ‘Facebook depression’ develops as a result of lots of time on social media. Comparing self to photos of others and the illusion of others’ better lives, may decrease self-esteem and cause depression. 

When is an appropriate time for your child to start using social media? 

The recommendation: Not before thirteen years old


- Context is important. Social media does serve some very useful functions keeping expat kids connected with family and friends back home or from previous postings.
- Beware of the pleading ‘Everyone else has an account’ excuse. 

How do you get your child into social media the safe and healthy way?

    •    Be the guide

    •    Be the mentor

    •    Be the follower


Our #1 resource guide is Common Sense Media

Watch the Q&A session from 59:22 onwards.
Access the slide deck here.

  • counseling
  • counselor
  • screen time
  • tech tips
  • technology
  • well being

 

 

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Didi Hari Krishnan

Did you miss the high school PTA parent coffee on Monday, December 6? Our high school leadership team and high school students shared how we support student wellness in the high school and how we respond to student data and trends. Parents also shared tips and strategies with each other to support our students at home.