FEBRUARY 23: MIDDLE SCHOOL PARENT COFFEE
Didi Hari Krishnan

From a recent survey by Straits Times (10 to 12 age range)
Singapore:
- 85 percent have smartphones
- Most popular platforms: WhatsApp, YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook
- 50 percent of parents fear limiting social media could affect their relationships

US: (2018 Common Sense Media survey (13 to 17 age range)
- 89 percent have smartphones
- 70 percent use social media every day
- Most popular platforms: Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook
- 72 percent of students think social media manipulates them to spend more time on their devices

SAS middle school parents' perspective: 
73 percent use WhatsApp
47 percent use Instagram

SAS middle school students' perspective:


Current social media trends:
- Chat apps (WhatsApp, Facebook messenger, and Google Chat
- Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok

New apps:
- Reddit, Discord, and Houseparty

Less popular apps:
- Facebook and Twitter

Other popular apps (not social media):
- Roblox, Fortnite, Minecraft, YouTube

Why is social media so appealing to teens?
The teenage brain is going through a major development cycle. It is primed for social media.
- Social connection is their primary driver
- Their brain is very sensitive to dopamine
- Teens have less inhibition

When is an appropriate time for your child to start using social media? 

The recommendation: Not before thirteen years old


- Context is important. Social media does serve some very useful functions keeping expat kids connected with family and friends back home or from previous postings.
- Beware of the pleading ‘Everyone else has an account’ excuse. 

How do you get your child into social media the safe and healthy way?


1. Be the guide

Shared Use
- Create a joint/family social media account.
- Talk through the setting up of privacy settings
- Share the creation of posts to demonstrate appropriate content, language, etc
- Jointly engage in chat, likes, and comments with family and friends

2. Be the mentor

Semi-Independent Use
- Jointly create a social media account for your tween/teen
- Talk through ideas for posts/content
- Guide the creation of posts & content
- Share access and review content, posts, etc and authorize posting

 3. Be the follower

Independent Use

- Review your child’s personal social media account (check privacy settings, etc)
- Become their first follower
- Check their posts, comment, etc as a follower

4. Be explicit about expectations throughout the social media progression

    Strategies for working towards screen-time and social media balance: 

Social media and Singapore law:

Violations of Singapore law: 
- Posts threatening racial and religious harmony in Singapore
- Posts showing contempt towards the Singapore courts and judiciary system
- Posts communicating falsehoods

In Singapore, people are not charged directly for cyberbullying, but they are charged with crimes related to one of these:
- Flaming: using provocative words against a person in a hostile online interaction;
- Harassment: continually sending vicious messages to an individual;
- Cyberstalking: ongoing online harassment and denigration that causes a person to fear for his/her safety, e.g. via threatening messages;
- Denigration: sending rumors or untruths to hurt a person’s reputation;
- Impersonation: posting offensive messages under another’s name;
- Trickery: fooling someone into sharing personal information which is then posted online;
- Outing: posting confidential or embarrassing information about a person; and
- Exclusion: purposely excluding someone from an online group.

What are some things kids do? 
- Send an intimate photo to someone without their consent.
- Collect intimate photos of people they know or do not know and sharing it with others.
- Trick someone to send nude or suggestive photos to be mean or blackmail them.
- AirDrop an intimate image to someone’s device without their consent.
- Paste someone’s face onto an intimate photo and sending it out.
- Impersonate people by creating an account using someone else’s name and information.

If your child receives mean messages, inappropriate photos, or requests from fake accounts:
1. Tell the other user to stop and tell them that they don’t want to receive images/messages like that.
2. Report the user to the social media site.
3. Block the user. 
4. On some platforms they may also need to “Restrict” the user.
5. Tell a trusted adult.
6. Consider reporting to the police.

Click here to access the slide deck.

  • parent coffee
  • parent tips
  • social media
  • technology

 

 

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Didi Hari Krishnan

Did you miss the high school PTA parent coffee on Monday, December 6? Our high school leadership team and high school students shared how we support student wellness in the high school and how we respond to student data and trends. Parents also shared tips and strategies with each other to support our students at home.